


Martin the Snowboarder

by aheshke



Category: Redwall Series - Brian Jacques
Genre: AU where Rose is alive ofc, Ficlet, Gen, Humor, Modern AU, Old Writing, Oneshot, Out of Character, backed up for posterity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-25
Updated: 2019-09-25
Packaged: 2020-10-28 09:57:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20776679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aheshke/pseuds/aheshke
Summary: Redwall's most legendary warrior tries snowboarding.[Originally written for DAB's 2011 Winter Solstice Gift Exchange.]





	Martin the Snowboarder

"Are you sure about this?" Rose asked Martin, watching him strap his boot-covered paws onto the slim, sloped board of wood.

"Of course I'm sure," he replied, straining to reach the last buckle. "If Gonff can do it, I can do it."

"And you're absolutely sure you don't want to try something a little easier for our age, like skis?"

"Absolutely sure." He straightened his helmet and stood up on his board, wobbling a bit before he regained his balance. "It's just snowboarding, Rose. I've done worse and survived."

And with that, the legendary warrior slid over to the edge of the slope and started down.

***

“Do ya gots him, Daddy?” asked Gonflet, peering at the small, fast-moving figure of Martin through a set of binoculars.

“I got ‘im,” said Gonff, holding his video camera as carefully as possible. “And he’s not suspecting _anything_.”

***

_This really isn’t so hard_, thought Martin. Sure, he was a little bit wobbly on the snowboard, but his lightning-quick reflexes, honed by years of sword fighting and other athletic activities, had luckily stepped in to keep him from falling over so far.

In fact, he was thinking he could probably snowboard forever.

If it weren’t for the very carefully placed bumps of snow right in front of him.

Suddenly, he was no longer snowboarding, but flying.

***

“One, two, three, four, five, _six_ front flips!” Gonff gave a low whistle. “That’s pretty impressive, though not nearly as impressive as the bruises he’s going to have tomorrow! And oh look—he’s trying to get up! Nope, he’s down. And he’s trying to get up again… He’s up again! My, my, my, doesn’t he look angry? Cover your ears, Gonflet. I don’t want to get blamed if you end up repeating some of that language to Mother dearest. Tch-tch, Martin. I know you grew up around sea vermin talk, but have you no concern for the dibbuns listening?”


End file.
